Tag Archives: Christian

Marriage and what it means to me…

19 Nov

In my opinion, marriage isn’t just a piece of paper. It’s a contract, an agreement between two people to spend the rest of their lives together…..and happily at that.We should never settle for ‘oh, I’ve married him now, I have to live with it.’ No, you don’t. If it’s that bad, leave. If not, make it work.

My first serious point is, The Wedding Band…don’t start quoting things to me or telling me about culture but personally, I think a wedding band is so important. Thankfully, my husband agreed. What do I think it means? And why do I think it is important? Well, there are a few reasons, it is clear to others that I am married, no longer available! In other words, DON’T BOTHER ME. It shows how important my marriage is. It’s a tiny thing, but it’s always there, always reminding me of the most important person in my life. AND for those exact reasons, I’m glad my husband wears one too…and note: the ‘how important my marriage is’ actually came from his mouth as I type this, I asked him, ‘why is your wedding ring important?’ He said, ‘it reminds me of how important my marriage is’.

Truth be told, it probably is that thing that stops men from making those little mistakes they shouldn’t make but some do.

Right, phew, now that’s out of the road, what next? Yes, ladies…

I think there are a few things that we forget.LADIES. Yes, this is directed at the ladies and for once, I’m making US out to be the ‘bad ones’.

Perhaps, we ‘let ourselves go’. Ladies, we forget the importance of ‘looking nice’, ‘wearing a little makeup’, even jewellery.

I’m not saying that these materialistic things matter BUT I do believe they have some importance.

Put yourself in your husband’s shoes. He comes home, find you in your pjs, trackie bottoms, makeup not done, hair looking like you could fry and egg on it…well, it’s not a very pretty site. Yes, of course, there are going to be days when you will be in trackie bottoms and he will love you just as much but every once in a while, make the effort.

As women, we are quick to blame the man for many, many things. We should all stop and think, sometimes, it IS our fault.

He married a ‘fun’, ‘loving’, woman…try and stay that way.

One problem that ‘crops’ up in marriage is children.

We tend to think we need to take our children EVERYWHERE with us. We don’t. We can arrange to leave them with family/friends and have those romantic nights out with our husbands. They need YOU, ALONE. It’s difficult to have ‘real’ adult conversation with kids around…infact, it’s almost impossible. What if your husband wants to say, ‘damn, you look hot today’…it will resort to ‘you look nice’ and then, we complain. Huh, he said, ‘nice, bes’ that was it…well, what else can he say in front of a 6 year old?

Time alone is VITAL.

Once or twice a week is CRUCIAL. Coffee dates, dinner dates, cinema, a walk on the beach…you are never too old.

Remember that couple that you saw sitting by the pier, eating fish and chips out of a paper bag that were in their 70’s…that is MY aim. I want to be that couple.

Most of us marry our best friends and learn to love them as a ‘title’…a husband or a wife. We all have our ups and downs but we must always remember the reason we fell in love in the first place.

What does marriage mean to you? I’m interested to know. The divorce rate in Kuwait is so high…why? And why can’t marriage be taken more seriously?

Don’t leave it too long…

23 Sep

The reality is, most of us wait for that perfect someone. We dream in our teenage years of finding our soulmate. We wait for that ‘perfect’ one. We wait and we wait and we wait but the truth is, no-one is perfect, be it a man or a woman.

You will find faults with your husband and your wife. Everyone has something that will annoy the other person but you got to work through those faults and remember why it is you came to love each other in the first place. But what if you didn’t love each other in the first place? What if it was an arranged marriage?

This week, I had a recently married ‘arosa’ on the telephone, crying. It was an arranged marriage and she felt like he wasn’t paying attention to her, was shouting too much…’you can’t do this, you can’t do that’…the ‘I’ve just got married, you don’t cook like my mother syndrome’.

This is life. This is marriage. Of course EVERYONE has their problems. Within time, for many, they do disappear but what if they don’t, all because you didn’t know the person to begin with?

Marriage of Louis of France, Duke of Burgundy ...

I for one can’t understand why anyone would agree to an arranged marriage in the first place, YES, I know it’s the culture, it’s tradition, it’s this, it’s that and it doesn’t only happen here. Arranged marriages date right back to Louis XIV of France and Marie Theresa of Spain which was the 16th Century BUT…how can you put two people in a house and expect them to get along? What if they hate each other? What if they can’t stand to even hear the other one speak? Perhaps, that persons voice irritates the hell out of you, what then?

My advice to her was, he is your husband, you agreed to this. You aren’t a stupid person, you are intelligent, this is going to take time, ALOT of time. But what else could I say to her? You were stupid to ever do it in the first place?

We all have problems. We dwell on life too much. We question too much. We wish too much. We wonder too much. We aren’t grateful enough. So here’s what I have to say.

Be happy and grateful for what you have.

If you wait and wait and wait for; that perfect moment, that perfect guy, that perfect day, that perfect month-your life will be over.

Take each day as it comes.

Live life to the full.

Wake up with a smile on your face.

Just say el7umdela for what you have been given.

Afterall, no-one is perfect.