Tag Archives: Parenting

Marriage and what it means to me…

19 Nov

In my opinion, marriage isn’t just a piece of paper. It’s a contract, an agreement between two people to spend the rest of their lives together…..and happily at that.We should never settle for ‘oh, I’ve married him now, I have to live with it.’ No, you don’t. If it’s that bad, leave. If not, make it work.

My first serious point is, The Wedding Band…don’t start quoting things to me or telling me about culture but personally, I think a wedding band is so important. Thankfully, my husband agreed. What do I think it means? And why do I think it is important? Well, there are a few reasons, it is clear to others that I am married, no longer available! In other words, DON’T BOTHER ME. It shows how important my marriage is. It’s a tiny thing, but it’s always there, always reminding me of the most important person in my life. AND for those exact reasons, I’m glad my husband wears one too…and note: the ‘how important my marriage is’ actually came from his mouth as I type this, I asked him, ‘why is your wedding ring important?’ He said, ‘it reminds me of how important my marriage is’.

Truth be told, it probably is that thing that stops men from making those little mistakes they shouldn’t make but some do.

Right, phew, now that’s out of the road, what next? Yes, ladies…

I think there are a few things that we forget.LADIES. Yes, this is directed at the ladies and for once, I’m making US out to be the ‘bad ones’.

Perhaps, we ‘let ourselves go’. Ladies, we forget the importance of ‘looking nice’, ‘wearing a little makeup’, even jewellery.

I’m not saying that these materialistic things matter BUT I do believe they have some importance.

Put yourself in your husband’s shoes. He comes home, find you in your pjs, trackie bottoms, makeup not done, hair looking like you could fry and egg on it…well, it’s not a very pretty site. Yes, of course, there are going to be days when you will be in trackie bottoms and he will love you just as much but every once in a while, make the effort.

As women, we are quick to blame the man for many, many things. We should all stop and think, sometimes, it IS our fault.

He married a ‘fun’, ‘loving’, woman…try and stay that way.

One problem that ‘crops’ up in marriage is children.

We tend to think we need to take our children EVERYWHERE with us. We don’t. We can arrange to leave them with family/friends and have those romantic nights out with our husbands. They need YOU, ALONE. It’s difficult to have ‘real’ adult conversation with kids around…infact, it’s almost impossible. What if your husband wants to say, ‘damn, you look hot today’…it will resort to ‘you look nice’ and then, we complain. Huh, he said, ‘nice, bes’ that was it…well, what else can he say in front of a 6 year old?

Time alone is VITAL.

Once or twice a week is CRUCIAL. Coffee dates, dinner dates, cinema, a walk on the beach…you are never too old.

Remember that couple that you saw sitting by the pier, eating fish and chips out of a paper bag that were in their 70’s…that is MY aim. I want to be that couple.

Most of us marry our best friends and learn to love them as a ‘title’…a husband or a wife. We all have our ups and downs but we must always remember the reason we fell in love in the first place.

What does marriage mean to you? I’m interested to know. The divorce rate in Kuwait is so high…why? And why can’t marriage be taken more seriously?

Role reversal for 2010

13 Sep
Cover of "Daddy Day Care (Special Edition...

Cover of Daddy Day Care (Special Edition)

I just finished watching ‘Daddy Day Care’. I love that movie. Eddie Murphy is hilarious and his son….well, absolutely adorable. It got me thinking, how would that work for my husband and I? I go to work, he stays at home and becomes a househusband…

What’s a househusband? A stay at home dad or house husband is a term many westerners use to describe a father who is the main caregiver of the children and/or is the homemaker of the household. As families have evolved, the practice of being a stay-at-home dad has become more common…

How would that work here?LOL…oh I shouldn’t laugh because I’m one of the lucky ones, my husband irons his own shirts, can make his own dinner and if I wanted him to, could clean the house and do a pretty good job…he even changes diapers and makes up bottles of milk…long term tho? No, I don’t think he could cope.

Stay at home dads in the western world are still stereotyped but it is becoming more and more socially acceptable…here, however, it would be totally unacceptable due to the culture.

So when did it become OK for men to ‘stay at home’? How did this change come about?

Well it dates back to World War Two. Everything started to change in WW11, the vast majority of men had to go to war and therefore women had to fill many positions that would have been deemed unsuitable. This increase in working women became one of the few times in history where women were praised for work outside the home.

So is there an advantage to a stay at home dad rather than a stay at home mum?

Personally, I love being a stay at home mum.

I enjoy every minute I spend with my kids BUT the bond between father and child is just as important as the mother’s in the overall social and emotional development of a child. Emotionally and mentally father’s may actually help their children long term, mothers reassure toddlers when they become frustrated while fathers encourage them to manage their frustration. This helps the children learn to deal with stress and frustration which is important to achieve at a young age.

A 1996 study by McGill University found that the “single most important childhood factor in developing empathy is paternal involvement in childcare.

So there you have it Dads…you are as equally important if not more in the first five years of your child’s life.

So, no matter how tired you are from work, take an hour out of your day and spend it with your kids! Take them to play ball or go for a walk…spend some time with your kids, it’s not only the mums that matter!

What’s burning in your house this Ramadan?

20 Aug

Is it the muchboos? Katayef? Taouk? Or…is it the latest craze to hit Kuwait? Yes, you’ve guessed it… Oil Burners!

Is it time to say good-bye to our beloved bakhoor?

I noticed recently that my mil has stopped burning bakhoor and has not got herself a beautiful, little red oil burner. I was shocked to say the least but after speaking with friends it appears their mothers are doing the same thing! It’s nice to smell something other than bakhoor to be honest, sometimes I just find it too strong! Last night after my regular visit for fatoor, I came home smelling of jasmine! Nice! You can find these oil burners in sultan centre, centrepoint and even Ikea. The prices range from 1.500kd – 9kd depending on shape, size and decor.